Rahul Baba, Little Maharaja, Demonetisation, Rangoon

Yesterday, I read an interview with Sheila Dikshit in the Times of India. Ms. Dikshit is a three-time former chief minister of Delhi and was the presumptive Congress chief minister of Uttar Pradesh until Rahul Baba hit up with Mulayam Baba. She’s also a long time confidant of the Gandhi-Nehru family with an association going back many years through her father-in-law Uma Shankar Dikshit. Thus, with all the right background and kitchen cabinet access, she should know what she was saying. “Rahul is still not mature, his age does not allow him to be mature“. I nearly fell off my chair laughing. My wife thought I have had a convulsion. She had never seen me like this in a long time. Really, something in a long time to laugh about!

David Cameron became the British prime minister at the age of forty four and by fifty he had left politics. Justin Trudeau became the Canadian prime minister also at the age of forty four. His father, Pierre Trudeau, became prime minister at the age of forty eight. Bill Clinton became president at forty-seven, Obama at forty-eight and John F. Kennedy at forty-four. All not mature, I presume.

And all charming men too. Pierre Trudeau was dating Barbara Streisand. Marilyn Monroe was sleeping with JFK. Well, do I say something about Bill?

And, mind you, Rahul Baba will be  forty-seven this June. Wonder if any of the Indian girls find him attractive! Unless, of course, you’re Colombian.

Rahul Baba’s sidekick is the Little Maharaja, Jyotiraditya Scindia. You often find him sitting next to Rahul Baba in the Lok Sabha. Little Maharaja, once when speaking in the Lok Sabha on the subject of youth programmes, said, “Hum nau jawan lok …”  Nau Jawan lok? He was the father of a seventeen year old! When will the baba lok grow up.

The Little Maharaja, when he was a junior minister in the Manmohan Singh government used to answer his phone saying, “Maharaj speaking!”. When a senior minister came to know of this called him aside and asked him to cut the crap. Little did he know that the rajas and maharajas were long consigned to the dustbin of Indian history.

Reading the pinkos, one gets the impression that the demonetisation has done a lot of harm to businesses. Car sales are down, white good sales are down, mobile sales are down. Wonder if all the stuff purchased was in cash? If so, then most guys who brought the stuff had plenty of black money.

A buy-on-TV venture run by Raj Kundra, better known as the husband of that British Bigg Boss winner and “B” movie actress and now full time dance show judge, Shilpa Shetty, has closed down his business. Reason: Demonetisation. A nice reason to close down a loss making venture.  He’s still to pay his vendors. Last heard that they’re going to sue Kundra. Yes, I’m talking about the same Raj Kundra who’s facing charges of spot fixing during the IPLs.

Then we have LG, the electronic giant from Korea, saying it made mistakes when launching its mobile in India. This is what happens when you try to sell inferior stuff in India. Indians now want the best that’s in the world. They don’t want cars made out of twenty year old dies and tools. They don’t want 2G, they want 4G and VoLTE.

Saw Rangoon today. Great photography, great songs, great acting by the three-some. Kangana stands out. Got a real 40’s look. The dresses, her red lipstick, her hair style adds to her sensuality. Go watch it.

Mumbai Elections, Snapdeal and Kangana

I would have written this blog at the weekend but couldn’t resist after the Maharashtra municipal and local bodies’ election results started coming in.

I’m not an admirer of the BJP. Having brought up in a liberal and free thinking environment, both at home and school,  I detest the Hindutva ideology. I, however, support Modi’s economic policies. I’ve been an advocate of demonetisation even before Modi heard it from the so called Pune think tank. The rest of the purported advice given by this think tank is to be dumped into the trash can where it should rest permanently.

I’m not elated by the BJP victories. I’m, however, happy that the Shiv Sena has been thrashed. It would take them a while to recover from the concussion. I’m even more elevated at the total whitewash of that goon and thug, Raj Thackeray, who is yet to tell the world his source of income. I always wonder how an unemployed, mediocre cartoonist  can live such a luxurious life, own a penthouse, drive a Mercedes and holiday in the US. I suspect, as others do, but are scared to admit, that the threats to film stars and producers and road toll collectors fund his lifestyle.

There will be many funny asides to the election in the days to come. One is already playing out. Pankaja Munde, in a time honoured charade, said she will submit her resignation as minister to the chief minister for the dismal show of the BJP in the constituency she represents. And the play acting will continue with the chief minister refusing to accept it and asking her to continue as minister.

Away from politics, today’s newspapers carry a news item that Snapdeal is to lay off hundreds of employees and the top bosses are taking a hundred percent salary cut. That’s pretty cool after having milked the company. I’ve always wondered how long could companies last making such huge losses. I’m equally wonderstruck as how  well known angel investors and venture capitalists, who employ the best of brains from the best universities in the US and India, can commit to put good money after bad. I can understand that you can make losses in one quarter. But quarter after quarter? It is a no brainer. In the inside pages of the newspapers there’s a two column piece. The vendors to Snapdeal are scared that they may not receive the monies Snapdeal has collected from the customers on behalf of the vendors. I think we’re headed for a big time scam. The next in line is Flipkart!

Coming to movieland, it is an open secret that in Bollywood there are some holy cows. You can’t print or say anything about them:  Lata Mangeshkar, Amitabh Bachchan, Salman Khan, Karan Johar to name a few.  I saw an episode of Koffee with Karan. The guests were Kangana Ranaut and Saif Ali Khan. Actors whom I admire. Kangana for her looks, opinions and acting and Saif for his bearing, family background and acting. Karan Johar in his programme usually carries a very jolly demeanor and seem to have an easy relationship with his guests. However, in this episode, he appeared to be reserved and deferring to Kangana. Possibly because Kangana is known for her temper, strong views and opinions. As the show went on, we knew why. To a question on writing her memoirs, she responded that in it Karan Johar would appear as  the godfather of Bollywood mafia promoting influence and nepotism. When asked if she would act with the other Khans, she said she wouldn’t.  She didn’t want to play second fiddle to people who do not want females to play leading roles. Taking on Karan Johar and the Khans? I admire this girl’s gumption.

Guys, that’s it for now!

 

The Indian And His Economics

When the Indian looks forward to the budget announcement by her finance minister, she’s more concerned about what’s in it for her, the industrialist for what’s in it for him but no one’s bothered about what’s in it for the economy!

That’s the other trait of the Ugly Indian!

On February 1, budget day, I surfed the English language channels to see the reactions. All channels had the same script. The participants spouted wisdom and that too with a lot of gravitas. But nothing helped cleared my already cluttered brain.  I sometimes wondered if they had ever read any book on economics after they graduated. So much has changed yet for these guys on television they remain the same. Plus ca change, plus ca meme chose! There was a danger that whatever little economics I knew would be lost. So I did the next best thing. Switched off the set.

This Tuesday, the RBI may or may not announce a rate hike. But then our pundits are out with their predictions. But as usual they are out with caveats. Just in case their call goes wrong.

I’m not sure why the industrialists are so concerned about interest rates? Interest is not the only cost element. They should be looking at their own house cleaning, managing inventories, debtors, cost reduction, supply chain management. Improving the productivity of the other factors of production. That doesn’t cross the mind of the pundits.

Then there’s this story about Apple wanting to enter India but on their terms. They want a fifteen years tax exemption. And a policy change to import what’s euphemistically called pre-owned mobiles. I’ve heard of pre-owned cars. But pre-owned mobiles? I know Pakistan is the only country in Asia that allows second hand items to be imported. Japan has a rule that after five years, a car should go for a physical check. The cost of such a check is more than the cost of a new car. So the Japanese sell their cars which are then exported to our friends in Pakistan and Africa. How do you think all these Toyotas pick-ups end up with the Mujahideens? I hope Apple doesn’t  think we’re a banana republic!

As I write comes news that Chinamma is to be the next chief minister of Tamil Nadu. We’ve had Anna, Amma, now Chinamma. Well others may follow: Mami, Mama, Chittappa. You can’t predict Tamil Nadu politics!